• Check attitudes. Is your child too tired or hungry to shop? Are you? If yes, postpone your trip or find a sitter.
•  Explain the rules. Before entering the store make your expectations clear. For example, "Stay close to me” or "Use your quiet voice."

• Make a game out of shopping. Who can see the bananas? Who can find the shoe store first? Who can see a person wearing red? Which store begins with a T?
• Give children some choices. When possible, allow your child to make some decisions. Blue or red socks? Chocolate or vanilla ice cream? Be prepared to bargain or compromise.
• Play. "I see something . . .” Then ask your child what it is.
• Praise your child. "You are being so helpful." A hug can be reassuring and say more than words at times.

• Kids will be kids. They are not perfect and neither are adults.
• Ignore inappropriate behavior unless it becomes dangerous, destructive, annoying to others, or truly embarrassing.
• Remove a child who is out of control. Take him to the restroom or out of the store. Tell him quietly, eye to eye, that his behavior is absolutely unacceptable.
• Wait for the child to calm down. Say nothing at all until she does, then ask if she is ready to try again.
• Go home if the child cannot calm down. If the shopping can't wait, find a sitter and return alone.

If you are struggling with the demands of parenting, the Prevention Information Resource Center and Parent Helpline is available throughout New York State, 24 hours a day, in English and Spanish, at 1-800-342-7472. Someone will listen to your concerns and give you information about programs and services that support parents and children.

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